Introducing adult toys to your partner
Introducing adult toys to your partner.
I know. I've heard it before too. Why would you need toys if you're in a relationship? Why would you need the extra "help” when you're having regular sex with a partner? It's such a common misconception that adult toys are meant to replace your partner, when in reality the use of these devices can optimize your sexual experience with each other, and actually being you CLOSER together.
"Won't my partner feel inadequate?"
Often I see, and have also experienced, the belief that using a toy in your sexual escapades could give a feeling of inadequacy to your partner. I mean let's, face it, your partners genitals can't vibrate. Your body may be accustomed of things your partners body just can't do. It can be complicated to introduce toys into a relationship while also avoiding making them feel like they aren't "good enough". The best way to do this is by being very open and honest about your sexual needs. If there's something you feel you need to add into the mix, explain to your partner what that is, how the toy can help, and also how it can pleasure THEM. YOUR PARTNER WANTS YOU TO FEEL GOOD. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you need! It's better to discuss and work it out together than sneak off with your vibrator to get the job done after.
"What if my partner has never used toys before?"
We all have to start somewhere!
There was a time we all were new to using adult toys. If your partner is weary if trying out something new and different to them THAT'S OK. That's normal. Explain to them how it can benefit the experience, how it works, and what to expect. And TAKE IT SLOW. It's always scary introducing new sensations to the body. Don't push and allow them to process the experience in their own way. If you don't know what toy they need, or how it works. EXPLORE TOGETHER. Look at reviews, instructional videos, and ask questions! Almost all sellers want your satisfaction and are always open to Feedback and questions. Doing this process together is a good way to become closer and make the experience a "team effort" rather than you just telling them what they need.
"I'm too embarrassed to bring it up"
Also, completely understandable. When I got my first vibrator, I was embarrassed. I hid it under my mattress, and it was my dirty little secret. I promise you that is not good for anyone! Most people are willing to explore other options, as well as eager to please sexually. A good partner will always want you satisfied and should not judge you for wanting to accomplish that! You may be surprised; they might already use toys themselves! Yes, the conversation can be uncomfortable, but not as uncomfortable as unsatisfying sex right?
"if we introduce toys, can we ever have sex without then again, or will it ruin that?"
There is no reason you can't go back after the use of toys. I use them often in my relationship and just as often not. Not every romp in the sack must be intense and wild! The most important thing in the bedroom is connection, and you already have that! It's to enhance your experience! Not to replace it!
"Are there any other benefits to introducing toys to my partner?"
Yes, yes, and YES!
the use of toys not only make the "Main show" more intense, it can prolong and boost foreplay! There is nothing better than a good vibrator and a slow tease.
Sometimes you're simply tired. If you introduce toys, that "I'm too tired, babe" is less apt to happen. Because while I always want and orgasm, sometimes I don't feel like doing the work. With the aid of toys it's a lot easier to get the job done, without straining myself too much.
And lastly, it's FUN!
Certainly, toys aren't for everyone, but the majority of people are always after that little bit more. Toys are a great way to keep sex in a relationship interesting, to learn how to please your partner most efficiently, and to explore the more "freaky" side of yourselves. And the result of all that being your partner and you grow even closer. So don't be afraid, grab your partner, and start talking!